You might notice you’re going through the motions during intimacy. Your body is there, but you aren’t really in it. You touch, kiss, have sex, but there’s no clear excitement. No real yes. No real no. Just kind of numb. On autopilot.
Sometimes you tell yourself you should feel desire. But when you slow down and check in, there’s nothing happening in your body.
That’s usually the moment people reach out to me. Not because something is wrong, but because they’re tired of pretending everything is fine.
I teach this because this was my experience.

If this sounds familiar, you might:
- Go quiet or freeze when intimacy starts
- Overthink instead of feeling
- Hold your breath without realizing it
- Feel pressure to respond a certain way
- Want connection, but not know how to access it
A lot of people think this means they’ve lost desire.
What I see, over and over, is that they’ve lost contact with their body.
Who I Work With
I work with individuals and couples of all genders and orientations.
People come to me when they want intimacy to feel real again, not performative or numb.
That includes:
- Women who were taught to feel shame in their bodies, who are going through a breakup, miscarriage, illness, or heartbreak or who are constantly in survival mode
- Men tired of pressure to do it right, who are worried about performance and if they’re good enough; or who feel tense and lose confidence as their mind races during intimacy
- LGBTQ+ individuals exploring desire without judgment and who are trying to be more comfortable with who they are
- Couples who care about each other but feel out of sync because of the pressures of life

What Sessions Are Like
When you arrive, we start simply.
We greet each other, first with a hug. Sometimes that alone brings up more than people expect. Then we sit down, have tea or water, and talk. I’ll ask how you’re arriving that day, what feels tight, what feels open, and what feels like a clear no.
Nothing is rushed. Nothing is assumed.
We talk through boundaries before anything happens. You stay in control of pace, touch, and clothing the entire time. I check in often.
The beginning is usually quiet, incorporating breathing, eye contact, light touch, and sometimes just noticing where your body is holding tension.
I often say, “Our issues live in our tissues.” Instead of analyzing emotions, I’ll ask where you feel something physically. Is it in your jaw, chest, belly, lower back, or somewhere else? That’s usually where things start to shift.
One of the first signs I see when someone drops in is their breath changing. Then your shoulders soften and your body settles.
Reclaim Your Pleasure | Venice Beach, CA | Martins Zalitis
What Changes
This isn’t about chasing pleasure or peak experiences.
Over time, people tell me:
- They feel more present during intimacy
- Saying yes or no feels clearer
- Their body responds more honestly
- They don’t feel the same pressure to perform
- Desire feels natural again, not forced
A common thing I hear is:
“I thought this would be uncomfortable… but it wasn’t.” Or: “I realized I don’t have to control everything.”

About Me
My name is Martins Zalitis.
I do this work because I’ve lived this disconnection myself.
I’ve been in long-term relationships. From the outside, things looked good. Busy life, goals, success. But intimacy slowly faded. Not because of a lack of love, but because we stopped slowing down enough to actually feel each other.
I didn’t accept that numbness or distance it was just how it goes.
I studied, practiced, and paid close attention to what actually helped me come back into my body without forcing anything. That experience shapes how I work today.
My background includes Daoist Tantra, body-based practices, and coaching. In real life, that means I work slowly, practically, and with a lot of attention to what’s actually happening in your body at the moment.
Reclaim Your Pleasure | Venice Beach, CA | Martins Zalitis
Contact & Next Steps
I offer a complimentary 30-minute discovery call to see if this work feels right for you.
When you reach out, please include:
- Your name
- A few sentences about what’s going on for you
- Your intention for working together
The discovery call is part of my screening process. It helps make sure this feels aligned and safe for both of us.
Email: hello@martinscoaching.com
Text: 305-646-8771
Sessions begin at $555 for 2 hours.
Change usually begins with noticing what isn’t working anymore. If that’s where you are, you’re welcome to reach out.

Testimonials
“Through this work, I was able to release the tension and experiences my body had accumulated, connect more with my power and intuition, and become more aware of my emotions. I learned how to live more in the present and feel more grounded, grateful, and happy in my life.” ~ M
“When I came to you, I was in pain throughout my entire body, feeling drained and heavy. The next morning I woke up pain free, energized, and light. I felt seen, cared for, and renewed on every level physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I am deeply grateful to have crossed paths with you.” ~ A
“Having met you has changed my inner world. I see life differently now. I have a completely different outlook, and the way you inspired and educated me helped me feel more connected to myself and to life.” ~ A
Back to Sacred Eros home page.
I’m Martins Zalitis, I help to Reclaim Your Pleasure.
I welcome:
Women, Men, All Genders, Couples